Relenting to a persuasive argument by a neighbor I put on a notification on the fence for one of Tabby’s suitor. Male, white fur dominant with yellow patches on the head, long hair. No photos. Everyone who claim as parents of the cat must answer max three questions.
The next morning a dozen of people are making the bee line. By their look I am not convinced, but I am halfway there anyway. Here are the most memorable.
First in line
Me: So, what color is the tail?
Me: Just yellow?
Applicant, what else? if he has yellow patches it is usually yellow.
Me: Good answer. I like your logic. Good morning. Next!
(Boy has ring tail, see that M mark on the forehead? He’s a tabby)
Second in line
Me: Good morning mam. You lost a white and yellow cat?
Applicant: yes. I had him since he was a baby, I really miss him.
Me: It must be hard. What color is his eyes?
Applicant: um…(looking left and right) what color is his eyes? Aren’t all cats has the same eye color? (peeking on Hanshin lounging on next door house’s fence) Green?
Me: Hanshin does have green eyes mam, you have a good observation, but I am afraid this one is not your baby. (and even if it is I doubt she even ever cared for the cat)
Third in line
Applicant: Good morning miss
Me: Good morning! A bright day today no?
Applicant: Yes it sure is, it’s going to be hot! I hope this finishes soon because it will be burning like hell as I need to go home to Lembang
Me: Oh really? you drive all the way from Lembang here? It must be like, say, one and a half hour drive, if the road is empty?
Applicant: More! Traffic jam. Today is holiday, we have very long weekend.
Me: I see. I won’t waste your time then. Just one question: How do you think that cat got here all the way from Lembang. Lembang is on the other side of the mountain literally?
Applicant: I have no idea. I never have cats, it’s just that since the cat is long hair, I think I can just adopt him and get him mated with one of my neighbors and we can share the money.
Me: Have a pleasant journey home sir, watch out for nails (because I hope you flat your tire and have to push your motorcycle all the way up the mountain) Next!
The fourth is the most convincing
Applicant: I want to ask questions.
Me: Have it your way.
Applicant: Is the cat male?
Me: As stated in the ad, yes.
Applicant: He has long hair, white with yellow patches. Does he has the yellow M on his forehead?
Applicant: Does he have brown eyes?
Applicant: Does he have fluffy tail with white tips, like ribbon?
Applicant: Is he in productive age? I mean, he is still young and can produce baby?
Me: (raising my eyebrow) He is fixed now though.
Applicant: That’s sucks! He can’t have good looking babies then what’s the point?
Me: Exactly. Are you going to change your mind about him being your boy now?
Applicant number four turn around and go away.
The fifth heard the fourth and turned away as well.
The sixth go to the end of the line and texting.
The seventh (lucky number)
Me: Good morning Sir. How is it that you lost your cat?
Applicant: I didn’t lose my cat.
Me: All right, what brings you here?
Applicant: I keep switching to the end of the line just in case no one is eligible.
Me: I noticed. So you are going to adopt the cat if no one is eligible?
Applicant: yes please, as long as there are no fee or charges.
Me: No fee, but the cat is fixed. He can’t make babies.
Applicant: I heard so, but even if he can’t anymore I will still take him.
Me: Really? (my neighbor already excited)
Applicant: But you have to tell me what to do with him, at least temporarily.
Applicant: Well, if he can produce offspring that will be best because I can keep him and sell the baby, but if I can’t then, at least I can sell him.
My neighbor charged forward and have a go at the poor guy.
That’s my morning today folks, and why I am late posting. Not bad for stand up comedy.