I saw a little kitten scavenging for fish bone under steamed tuna stall, so I came over and buy some steamed tuna, set the kitten aside and give him more than enough.
After the kitten is full some pieces of tuna left. I left it on the ground for other cats to find, and cross the street.
A guy out of nowhere was giggling, whispering to the tuna seller, tug some paper out and pick all the tuna left.
He was about to wrap it up when he found me standing by his side asking “Why are you picking the tuna?”
Shock all over his face. Then he saw another cat scavenging for fish bone under the stall, and “Oooh! I want to feed this cat!” and he gave all the tuna to the other cat.
I stood there in silence.
After he stand back up, he start picking up his voice. “See? I feed the cat! Why would I take the tuna for myself?”
I was like “Huh?”
“I am beef seller!!!! I am richer than the tuna seller!!!! Why would I eat tuna, if I can eat beef? Beef more elegant!!!!!!”
I blinked. So were several others around.
“What are you talking about?” I asked.
“You are accusing me of picking tuna on the ground as if I am thief!”
I wanted to scratch my head but I hold tuna then. Tuna no good for hair spa, so I changed my mind.
All the while a female beef seller behind me was mumbling words and when I look at her, she chopped her beef so very loudly and harshly. But honestly, that doesn’t even look a pinch as intimidating as the horror movie made it.
“Dude, why is your pride so hurt if you didn’t intend to do something bad?” I mumbled.
The tuna seller whispered behind me, “Just leave him, it’s getting late, Chinese got burn easily.”
Oh… the same old racist bratitude.
“If I want, I can buy all of this you know!!!” Dude continued, “There is no need for me to pick some tuna up from the ground!!!!!. If you are a male I will kill you!!!!”
I smiled, turned around to face the tuna seller and ask “How much is all of these?”
The tuna seller gape.
“ALL of these, every single thing”
He said 400 thousand.
I pull out four hundred thousand from my purse, shove it to his gaping face, and commanded “Wrap them all up”
Tuna seller’s pride was hurt but losing money hurts more, half a million Rupiah in three minutes yo.
Half a million Indonesia Rupiah is USD 40.
As soon as all the fish wrapped up I gave the cat under the table a bunch of tuna. I gave the gathering stray cats a bunch of tuna. I gave a packet each to two old homeless man and woman watching from across the street. I gave another packet to a beggar dragging his old leg who often ask me for money.
I know every corner of that traditional market and who is who.
Today every stray cat in Bandung will eat tuna instead of Whiskas. I don’t mind smelling like fish for one day.
Everyone including the dude fell silent. The woman with chopping knife shrink when I spat to the ground just in front of her.
I know humblebragging is sooooo yesterday, but I need an alternative outlet where I won’t yank some dick off some jerk and shove it down the throat of some bitchy pussy.
Sorry my language, sorry the violence. I am usually an angel, but once in a while angel went on paid leave.